ADD TO CART?
Sometimes I wonder how we’d do it without Amelia’s.
Which is to say we buy our groceries from a variety of different supermarkets and produce stands. But when it comes to bang for you buck, it’s hard to beat a discount grocer like Amelia’s, or Aldi’s, or Shop-Rite –there are many around.
Associate Sunday News Editor Gil Smart in his column today, “Years late, dollars short.”
Shop much, Gil? I love ShopRite (please note there is no hyphen) and their prices are great but they are a regular grocery chain and not a discount grocer. You mean Save-A-Lot, Gil, which I also like and if you shop there you really do save a lot!
IT’S NOT FUNNY!
And Editor, Marvelous Marv, again turns to the police log for what he hopes is humor – trust me it’s not – and says this in his column today:
At a supermarket on Manheim Pike, an East Petersburg man, 58, was arrested for disorderly conduct after he confronted another customer about the number of items the person had to check out in the express lane.
This is totally understandable and I can’t believe the police arrested this man. Have you ever been behind someone in the express lane with 25 items in their cart? There is no excuse for this outrageous behavior. The six cans of beans do not count as one item – they are six! It’s obvious that Marv and Gil haven’t been inside a grocery store in years.
And Gil has today’s front page article with, “McCaskey coach left acting off his resume,” (click here). Under the article a Trashbacker posted this:
So what. He left acting off his resume! He also left child molestation off.
Well said! And in this long, ridiculous article, Gil quotes the superintendent as follows:
“We read his credits and realized [his roles] were not inappropriate by any means,” Rivera said.
Then genius Gil states several paragraphs later:
Three years later, in 1981, he had an uncredited bit part as “Lover Boy” in the racy teenage sex comedy “Private Lessons,” starring Sylvia Kristel.
So which is it – not inappropriate or racy? What does “racy” mean and how does Gil know? Did he watch it on company time?
HOW MUCH DID YOU TAKE HOME?
Under an article about the Human Relations Commission a Trashbacker said this:
Artie, with all due respect I will take care of myself if i am wronged in the future. My last paycheck had $2,800.65 taken out for TAXES. How much of my wealth do you really want or need. Have you no shame? How about you take care of you and i will take care of me.
Well, I guess you don’t shop at Save-A-Lot! Ummm… was that paycheck for two weeks? I want all of your wealth! What are you, a rocket scientist? You do know “I” should be upper case, don’t you?
CRAPPIEST CRIMINAL ATTORNEY?
And finally, for lovers of snark, today’s prize goes to “Citydweller” of LancTalk.com under the article, “City warrant list continues to grow,” (click here), where Mayor Gray is quoted as follows:
“Naïve is not a word I use to describe myself,” Gray said, “but when I took office I had no idea of the amount of bureaucracy in the system.”
Citydweller responded with this:
Wow, you had no idea? Man, you must have been the crappiest criminal attorney in Lancaster city. 30 years representing petty thugs in the judicial system, and you didn’t even know how it worked. Amazing.
Amazing snark! Well done!